SPEAKER_01 1:48

Good morning, good morning, good morning. Welcome to another episode of the Hilltop Glove Podcast. I'm DJ Ann What by myself today with a special guest, Chef J. We love our Chef Jay. We're actually here in Celeb Studios today, and we're really happy because it's our hundredth episode, y'all. Our hundredth episode. It's a big milestone. We hit that triple digits for the first time. And so we're gonna keep pushing past there and hopefully hit that 200, that 300, and that 400 episode. Um, but I just want to start with some background because of course I know her, she knows me, she knows a brother, but let's give some background. So, today, of course, we have our exciting guest, Judy Chef J. Etheridge, a Columbia-based wife, mother, grandmother, licensed cosmetologist, makeup artist, interior decorator, female farmer, health supportive chef, certified fitness trainer, and entrepreneur. She is the owner of several salons and studios in Columbia and Charleston, including Celeb Studio, Celebs Hair Salon. After attending Natural Gourmet Institute in New York City, Chef Judy Etheridge received the love of cooking for family and friends, starting the art of charcuterie, designing boxes for birthdays, bridal and baby showers, meetings, retirements, corporate lunches, events, retreats, and weekend brunches. Matter of fact, that's how I met her. Those things, those darn charcuterie boards are the bomb. With expertise in health and wellness, Chef Jay educates children about the importance of nutrition with her summer cooking classes. In 2006 and 2007, Ms. Etheridge and her salon team were Columbia's recipients of the Golden Scissors Award, which gave them the opportunity to compete in Washington, D.C. Chef J also serves on the board of directors at Providence Home, which is a Christian-centered transitional ministry for men. Currently, she is the host of At the Table with Chef J, a podcast in which guests prepare their favorite childhood dishes. Thank you for joining us today.

SPEAKER_00 3:34

How are you doing? How you doing? I tell you, it just feels amazing. Two things. Number one, with such a great relationship with you and Kevin, and also to be the 100. Come on, I love that.

SPEAKER_01 3:45

Come on. And I'll tell you, man, God works in a mysterious way. Um, the way things turned out today actually happened that we had extra time. And so we were like, hey, why don't we speak with somebody that we haven't had on our show yet, but that we do a lot of business with. So it made sense to um call you in, especially since we're sitting here in your lovely studios, and just to have you come in and speak with us about what you do. Matter of fact, my wife is bothering her to want to speak with her about what she does. Um, and we were recently on your show, well, the with the with the love of cooking, and um the at-the-table show that you do is fantastic. I will tell you. I was actually, it was kind of nerve-wracking for her at first, but I could tell immediately after doing it, she she wants to do more. And I'm happy that you invited us onto um your platform to do that. And I will be on your platform soon to do some cinnamon rolls. I'm ready for those cinnamon rolls, guys. I'm looking forward to it. I had to apologize. Like I missed it, I was sick and I missed out on the cinnamon rolls the first time. But we're gonna make up and we're gonna get those cinnamon rolls in there. Um, but as I always do with any of our guests who come on our show, uh, as if they do not know anything about you, because some people may not know who you are and what you're doing here and how you got to where you got to. Um, and so we just like to start off each episode with just some history, some background about your early beginnings, um, what it was like growing up, and what influenced you to be who you are today.

SPEAKER_00 5:07

Yes, I love that question. And I think that's what at the table is about, also. Yes, is about bringing that memory back from childhood. Well, I would say I had a great childhood. Um, a lot of people have like terrible, terrible storms about their childhood. Mine's been great because I had two a two-parent home.

SPEAKER_06 5:23

Excellent.

SPEAKER_00 5:23

And the only thing that one of the things that it did instill, which is one of the things I struggle with, is that they were hard workers. And that's why I am such a go-getter and a hard worker because that came from both my mom and dad. Both of them were hard workers, and they instilled that in me. And I'm glad I'm not lazy about doing anything, and I'm always creative and thinking about things. Now, that is one thing, Chef J loves people, but I don't like laziness.

SPEAKER_01 5:45

No, no, y'all, that's the truth.

SPEAKER_00 5:46

Yeah, I do not like laziness. You can show by, you know, my resume and my what we do, you know. And I love people. I have a love for people because I think with all of us, you know, what makes us so much different is our culture and our upbringing, but also the different foods and the different things as people being able to carry on different businesses. And I think that's what sets us apart. Before I went to culinary school, I was um a licensed cosmetologist and I worked in the beauty, beauty world for 40 years. And um, I've always worked on African-American women. But when I went to culinary school, um, we had 16 students with the first session I went in, and they was from all over the world. And I've never been in a setting like that where I have people from um Saudi Arabia, South Africa, Thailand, France. And I was watched this whole time I was taking this course, is that we're not, no one is no better than one another. That's one thing I want people to know. No matter the education background, where they come, they are still human and they deserve somebody to love and embrace them. Um, so when I was in that setting and the whole time I was there, um, I was like, God, I said, we're just the same. And so I um befriended this young lady that was from Talent. And you know, a lot of times we have people come in our house when we are having dinners or stuff, or they say, Well, I don't eat this, I don't eat this, I don't want this, I don't want this. And she made me think about something. She said, um, I um she said, in their culture, they don't eat pork. But if she comes to my home and I'm serving pork, it's disrespectful for her to say that.

SPEAKER_05 7:18

Thank you. And that just hit me.

SPEAKER_00 7:20

A lot of times we disrespect people from just who they are and culturally, and I'm really big on embracing everyone. It doesn't matter what color they are.

SPEAKER_01 7:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:28

As long as they give me respect, I give them respect.

SPEAKER_01 7:30

I have to ask you this question, Sanjay. Where were you? Um, where were you raised? Where are you? Oh good.

SPEAKER_00 7:36

Yes. I was raised over on Monticello Road, which our family owned 50 acres of land. So my mom was, oh, that's why I got my I guess my skill from culinary. She taught at a private school. No, not taught, but she was one of the people that worked in the kitchen. And I got the love from cooking from her. And then she did that for years. And my dad was a farmer. But he also instilled in us our own. That's why I'm such an entrepreneur entrepreneur because all of my family owned their own business.

SPEAKER_01 8:03

I can tell. Yeah, everybody owned their own business.

SPEAKER_00 8:05

And that was instilled. So I took both of those from them and just made my own self.

SPEAKER_01 8:09

Hey, I don't blame. I look, and it makes sense because I know um when my wife and I were here doing the table with you, and you were we were talking about um some of the things that we were growing and planting, and you were telling us how you were doing yourself.

SPEAKER_03 8:22

I said, Well, how does she know about it? I know she knows how to do this and that. Where did that other part come from? Is she farming now? Yes.

SPEAKER_01 8:27

Um, and so that caught me off guard, but that that makes sense. Did you have any siblings growing up?

SPEAKER_00 8:31

Yes, it's um my mom had it was my mom and dad had seven children. Wow. And I'm the baby girl.

unknown 8:36

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 8:37

Um, and so all of my siblings live, we all get along, and that's what's important to a lot of people have dysfunction in the family. Yeah, and we we just get along. And you know, I tell you that, that's what I noticed about you and Kit. Yeah, yeah, we can't. You remember actually, I said, Can y'all always get along like that? And I love that. Now, in the meantime, I'm in the kitchen back there getting ready to do some caden jobs. And I said, I just love how they're talking. See, I'm in tune with what's going on around me. I'm present and in the moment. Um, and so that is one of the things, it's one of my big um niches too. That's the in present in the moment, what I gotta do at this time. And then I deal with whatever later, you know, doesn't have to have to do later. So being present, that's one of the things that has helped me be able to be successful as I am too.

SPEAKER_01 9:16

And do you think that's related to what you do when it comes to wellness and care for physical? Because like you said, like another thing, people got a lot of hats.

SPEAKER_04 9:25

Right.

SPEAKER_01 9:26

Um physical fitness.

SPEAKER_04 9:28

Right, that's right.

SPEAKER_01 9:28

Well-being. And um, and I know that's one thing I know when we're talking about eating stuff, like I told you, trying to get on this wellness kick, trying to make sure I take good care of myself. I know one of our um friends, so she's a folks, you know, too, JP, is actually doing an event today, which is interesting. Um, he was telling us, he was like, hey, by the time you get to 42, the way that your body is, that's where your benchmark is gonna be for the rest of your life. And so it made me really think about it because I'm like, okay, I'm about six, seven years from there. I need to make sure that I'm where I want to be at. So I can just maintain a good, healthy um status, and I can make sure to live well into my 70s and my 80s without having to be in pain and et cetera. So one of the things I know that we we always like to talk about entrepreneurship on this show, and this show is for millennials in the sense of a lot of us, we didn't grow up with a good map or book or guidelines on how to be successful or the routes that we need to take in the world. And one thing my brother and I, we always talked about when we came up with the concept of this podcast was man, I wish that the elders would have left us a book to tell us what to do. So whenever we have a chance to speak with folks that we respect and that we consider our elders, we always like to ask them, why do you do the things you do? Right? So that we can have a background of understanding, so we aren't just doing things um for the sake of the money.

SPEAKER_05 10:53

Right.

SPEAKER_01 10:53

Or, you know what I mean? There has to be a passion to it. So with all of the things that you do, with um all of your entrepreneurial um ventures and et cetera, um, I do want to talk about each of them, but specifically with wellness, what drove you to doing wellness? Because that's not really that wasn't really popular in our community or in our culture, um, especially growing up. I that's something that recently became very popular.

SPEAKER_00 11:16

Right. And so that that I started at 18. Wow. I started being healthy at 18, right? Wow. And so when the reason why was because I just loved exercising, I love eating healthy. That is one thing. I think you have to love it, first of all. Okay, and if you don't like it, just do a little bit at a time until you do like, because the body's gonna adjust to whatever you do to it. I like that. So if you if you start walking, you'll be amazed and say, you know what, I gotta get my walk in. So just start simple. And I think that's one of the things we got to get back to the basic of simplicity. I think we're just kind of all over the place with all the different social medias, um, just all the different foods, all the different restaurants and stuff like that. That really is that is their goal and mission, is to make money, but don't think about the health, okay? So I'm big on this is where this is where I live my life. I live it simple. I do my best and I treat people right, but I also have to take care of myself. And so people say, well, how do you do so much? I have a balance of that. So during the daytime, I shouldn't be sleeping because my body should be enough energy that I'm able to move around to get around.

SPEAKER_06 12:16

Great point.

SPEAKER_00 12:17

In nighttime, I'm no between 10 and 11 o'clock, that's my downtime. I normally try to get at least seven hours of sleep. But I think that we just gotta get back to simplicity, fixing our food at home. And if we're gonna eat out, think about what you want to do and bounce it out. You can't eat fries and french fries all the time. You gotta think about it. And so I ran into this young lady that um I know, and she said, Chef Jay, you know I don't like eating that hair stuff. She said, I like eating fried stuff all the time. All I like is fried food. Well, I ran into her at Sam and she said I had a mini stroke. Now she's younger than me. Oh man. So to me, it's ignorant.

SPEAKER_06 12:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:53

Okay, to me, it's ignorant when you don't take your life and your body seriously. Seriously, really, because it's so much out there that you can have. Just like we have social media, they have all kinds of platforms with different kinds of um apps.

SPEAKER_02 13:05

Very true.

SPEAKER_00 13:06

You know what I'm saying? Workouts are on very true. You know, we don't have no reason not to.

SPEAKER_02 13:10

No excuse. No excuse. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:12

Now the excuse ever said, Well, I don't care. Okay, when you get to the point in your life, I don't care. So my thing is that it's not about quantity of life, it's quality of life. And so that's what it really inspired me to go back to to go to culinary school because I was a certified fitness trainer.

SPEAKER_06 13:28

Already.

SPEAKER_00 13:28

And yeah, I was always certified fitness trainer, so I would have young ladies come in and say, Well, you know, what to eat? How much do you, what, you know, why I mean, I just don't know what to eat. So, you know, hmm, I'm that type of person that if I'm gonna do something, I'm definitely gonna get education behind it. It can be a certification, it could be a class, it's gonna be something. So I just don't say those things. Everything that I've done, I have done educat I have educated about it.

SPEAKER_01 13:49

It's a background.

SPEAKER_00 13:51

Yes, I just thought knowledge. Right. So I went exactly knowledge. I like that. Knowledge is powerful.

SPEAKER_03 13:55

Yes, ma'am.

SPEAKER_00 13:56

I'm telling you. Um, and so I went back to culinary school and I didn't go to any culinary school. That's why I went all the way to New York City.

SPEAKER_06 14:02

That's what I was wondering, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:03

And so, yeah, I went to New York City because they had the school in New York City called Natural Government Institute. Now, mind you, it was our anniversary. We had my husband planned a trip for us to go to California. And I said, can we please change the trip and go to New York? He had bought, you know, he had paid for the ticket. Oh, so we reversed and we went to New York City, and it was kind of like a vacation to him because I was in class, you know, from nine to five. Okay. Um, and I did, I stayed in New York for three, almost three weeks. And so each time I've been three times for cooking for people illness. So I'm educated in cooking for people with heart disease, cancer, diabetes. So that's one of my specialties. I do a lot of that. Um, and then I went back for culinary nutrition. So it's just not about what you eat. It's not, I mean, it's not about how much you eat, it's about what you eat, what kind of nutrition you're getting. That's one thing.

SPEAKER_04 14:56

Nutrition.

SPEAKER_00 14:56

The nutrition is the big thing, yes. And then I tell people if you don't not get nutrition from your food, supplement. So I believe in that too.

SPEAKER_01 15:03

I'm big on the supplement. Right. People think I'm crazy.

SPEAKER_00 15:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:05

I mean, at work, I got my little pill. They're like, what are you thinking? I'm like, I'm getting the supplements and because supplement.

SPEAKER_00 15:11

Because it helps you with your energy and it helps with all the elaborate.

SPEAKER_01 15:13

Yeah, especially if you can't get to the proper foods.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

Exactly. And then I went back again for um um vegan bacon. And they said, Well, why you went back for vegan bacon? I went back for vegan bacon because it's all kind of other bakers. You're right. We have people that have gut issues that won't enjoy desserts, yeah. And that's what you know. My education cost me probably about $50,000 just for those three sessions. And everything that I do, I save my money to do it. So I don't know anybody for my studio space. We did this space, it was about four to fifty thousand dollars. Yeah, and I want I say those numbers not to brag, but to say that you can't do anything. But it's about distance self-control. I have a lot of that, but I will tell you this story, I got unhealthy. And it was crazy, okay. Pandemic. Oh the pandemic threw me off. I was a health nut, eating healthy, and so I have got older. So that's two things, right? So your hormones change, it's easy for you to gain weight, and if you don't really pay attention, so and that's one thing I want to encourage people to really know your numbers. A lot of us don't go to the doctor for our health. Uh we don't go five physical.

SPEAKER_01 16:16

Yes, that you can't. You don't go five physical. Nah, we don't. I have mine coming up.

SPEAKER_00 16:20

Yes, I mean I'm afraid sometimes to go up like don't afraid because you need to know them numbers. And the reason why you need to know them numbers is because you need to know what you need to be proactive about. Okay, yeah. So I have to tell the story, and I know we have a short time, but I want the reason why I tell people the story is because health not fitness training in health and wellness. I went to my doctor in January of this year, and I said, I'm not feeling myself. Now we know if you pay attention to your body, you know you're not feeling myself.

SPEAKER_01 16:45

You know how you're supposed to be. You know your pants will start getting tight. Know it.

SPEAKER_00 16:48

You know, your head feeling a little high when you eat.

SPEAKER_01 16:50

You're tired when you shouldn't be tired.

SPEAKER_00 16:52

You shouldn't be sleeping on the bed.

SPEAKER_01 16:53

Yeah, no, you shouldn't be snoring.

SPEAKER_00 16:55

That's right. So I um I said, I'm not feeling good. So I fired my doctor. I fired a doctor in a minute. If they don't do it, tell people.

SPEAKER_01 17:02

I love that you say that because I work, I tell people you're your best health advocate.

SPEAKER_00 17:06

Right.

SPEAKER_01 17:06

Health equity starts with you.

SPEAKER_00 17:08

With you. And if you don't feel right, if you don't feel about that's the best ad manner, and if you don't feel that they are paying attention to you, because some people just brush you off.

SPEAKER_06 17:17

Yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_00 17:17

I fired my husband's doctor. Hey, yeah, because he was just brushing him off, he'll come in and give him a pill. And I said he did that about three times. And I'ma say, I told him just like this, I don't want your ass to go back to him. I told him just like that. So we find another doctor, yeah. She's very proactive, she listens to what we say, she gets blood tests. Because blood tests take pretty much anything.

SPEAKER_01 17:36

That's it. It's just like you go to take a car and take it. You gotta know what's inside of it. Right, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:40

So I want to tell people the story because me being a health nut and working out, I got unhealthy. And so I went to the doctor and I said, I'm not feeling myself. I need you to help me. So she took six vials of blood. We checked my hormones, all my levels. Now, this is what came back and more. Now you're talking about a health nut. So you think about people that don't pay attention, that don't work out, they just eat whatever they want. Cholesterol was high? My A1C was high, I was 50 pounds heavier.

SPEAKER_02 18:07

You are lying. I couldn't believe 50 pounds heavier.

SPEAKER_00 18:12

What? And then I um so she did all these tests, so found out I had to get hormone therapy. Okay, I take a cholesterol medicine. My A1C was up. So now I ate for blood sugar, that's how I lost weight. I ate for high blood sugar. So as you get older, that's why people gain weight as they get older, because their blood sugar, their hormones, okay? And so I tell people that I really want them to pay attention to their body. That's the best they could do for yourself.

SPEAKER_06 18:37

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:37

Pay attention to your body. And then this is one of the most things that I um that I saw was that my I had bone, my I had osteos in my back. What? I couldn't believe it.

SPEAKER_01 18:48

And you being a fitness person, being a health night.

SPEAKER_00 18:51

So I think about say, well, what would happen to somebody that don't pay attention to anything to their body, don't do anything, just eat whatever they want to. What's going on?

SPEAKER_01 18:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:57

So that's why we have where we have what you call a widowmaker. Do you feel are you familiar with that?

SPEAKER_01 19:01

Yes, yes. I am familiar with that's one of the scariest things. Scary, because a lot of things are it just comes and you don't. Yep, that's true.

SPEAKER_00 19:09

You know, and I mean it's just it's just heartbreaking because I really want us to take care of ourselves. Love on ourselves. That is the best thing.

SPEAKER_05 19:16

I like what you say like that.

SPEAKER_00 19:17

Self-love is the number one thing you can do for yourself. Yeah. When I say self-love, and what I mean by that is, you know, a lot of times we want to look a certain way and do it, you know. But I think that if we just take what we have and just fix it up, take care of it and love it. You know what I'm saying? Because I was um I was struggling with um, and also, too, I didn't realize I had body dysmorphia. Oh so I didn't see myself a size four. That's what size was before the pandemic. So this is what happened. A lot of times we wear leggings. I know I still wear leggings, right? But leggings were stretched, right? Along with you.

unknown 19:47

Oh, that's true.

SPEAKER_00 19:48

And that's how I didn't realize I had gained 50.

SPEAKER_02 19:50

That's true. Well, they said that four-way stretch, that four-way stretch be working. When I said I did not. Right, you're right. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:57

I couldn't believe it. I said, and I can't understand, I couldn't believe it. That really bothered me. And before, when I was 18 and I was vanity. It was vanity. But now those numbers was creeping up.

SPEAKER_01 20:07

So it's not vanity. It's not a good thing.

SPEAKER_00 20:08

It's not vanity, it's healthy. It's well, how you want to live your life? We never know how we're gonna leave or what's gonna happen and all that, right? But I believe that we'd be proactive and prevent it is the number one thing. Get a good doctor. If you don't know anybody, let me know. I find I got resources all over Columbia that I know a lot of people.

SPEAKER_01 20:25

That's not some people. And here in this in this region, we have a very competitive medical healthcare market.

SPEAKER_00 20:31

Right.

SPEAKER_01 20:32

You can find somebody to suit.

SPEAKER_00 20:34

Right. And especially if you're not satisfied your doctor, fire them.

SPEAKER_02 20:37

I agree. Fire them. Fire them.

SPEAKER_00 20:38

I'm telling you.

SPEAKER_02 20:39

Fire them.

SPEAKER_00 20:40

And I'm talking to dogs too. So if you're a good doctor, contact me because I got people that need good doctors.

SPEAKER_01 20:46

No, that is right on the money. Um, there's a what is it? There's this saying um around health and stuff, uh, that people say, wait, you know, they say health is wealth, et cetera.

SPEAKER_06 20:56

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 20:56

Um, and I tell people, you can live, like you can have the most money in the world, but if you don't have health, even that money may not be able to save you.

SPEAKER_00 21:07

Money can't save you, I'm telling you. That's right. And then we have to look at genetics.

SPEAKER_01 21:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:10

So my mom and dad both had diabetes. So, right, I'm on the goal and mission to prevent diabetes. I even want to create a group for young people, millennials like you guys, being able to recognize the signs and being able to prevent it. We gotta prevent it. We don't want to get it and then have to deal with it. We want to prevent it. Yeah, and some things maybe not preventable. If we give it our all, that's that's all we can do.

SPEAKER_01 21:32

That's it. Um like you said, it's it's way better than having to um get there and then fight to stay alive.

SPEAKER_00 21:42

That's it, that's what it's dealing with.

SPEAKER_01 21:43

And man, I know in our community we don't like being proactive, but we we do have to do a better job, especially our our young folks. Um and uh me being one of those folks and right on that that that edge between the real young, young folks and the folks who have a little bit more wisdom and understanding of things. Some of sometimes what we do is we'll be willfully ignorant. That's not ignorant, it's really willfully ignorant, which is worse. Right, which is worse.

SPEAKER_00 22:15

And then not on not only that, okay, not only that, too. We have where you have what you call food pushers. I talk about those. Do you know what that is, Hannuan?

SPEAKER_05 22:23

No, what's a food pusher?

SPEAKER_00 22:24

A food pusher is somebody that you getting healthy. You know y'all and your health kick.

SPEAKER_06 22:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 22:28

You come in with a big old piece and say, Hanwhine, you know you can have that for the day. You know you come on to eat this with me. I don't like no food pushers.

SPEAKER_01 22:36

I work with food pushers.

SPEAKER_00 22:37

Right, I'm telling you, yeah, I'm telling you.

SPEAKER_01 22:39

Here's a well, you know, look, this is a mess joke. You ready? Krispy Kreme, bread pudding.

SPEAKER_02 22:47

Yes. Food pushers.

SPEAKER_01 22:49

Okay. I avoided it. Right. I avoided it.

SPEAKER_00 22:52

And it takes a lot sometimes.

SPEAKER_01 22:53

I was good. It takes a lot, especially during this time of year.

SPEAKER_00 22:55

Okay, what I want you to do, I'm just gonna be your homework. Yeah, okay. I want you to go and look up the new nutritional facts about that. You're gonna be knocked off your foot. Also, too, Starbucks is another one that they basically serving ice cream, yeah, milkshakes, and coffee and milk. And just look at it. I wish I would have brought on. I speak to children, I go speak to schools, and um, I have one coming up Tuesday where I go to Hyde Park and I speak to children about to have ADHD. I speak to the parents. Oh. And I will make a visual of how much sugar is in that particular item. So this is a good math. All you do is like, so say for something has eight grams of sugar in it, right? Which normally is more than that. Say 13, 32 grams. You take that divide by four, that's how many teaspoons of sugar's in that particular drink or whatever. So I want you to do that, and I want you to text me what you got from that. Crispy cream bread putting it.

SPEAKER_05 23:46

That's gonna be horrible.

SPEAKER_00 23:47

And so the biggest thing is that's like the same thing, too. And I don't like to call out names, but just check the nutritional values of everything that you're eating. Okay. Um, you see some of the restaurants that have a long line around it, yeah. That means they have a lot of salt, a lot of sugar in their food because it's addictive. You gotta go back to get it. It's like because it's also dope, you know, connected to your brain, which is a dopamine. So that's what happened to me with the sugar. Dopamine, distress, and hormones.

SPEAKER_01 24:12

Gotcha. All them things work together. And it kind of calls it. Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 24:17

Right. And I just see it coming. I'm talking about a health nut now. I'm talking about somebody working out all the outcomes. So it can happen to anyone. That's what I want to make the point of. You know, none of us is exempt.

SPEAKER_01 24:27

Yeah, you're not exempt. Right. And that's the thing, it's not a judgment on it. No, it's just uh it's a realization. And you take it, and this is something my brother and I've been talking about that's real.

SPEAKER_00 24:37

Right.

SPEAKER_01 24:37

You actually saying to yourself, right, I have control, I am responsible for my actions. People don't want to do that when it comes to those things. And it kind of hurts your feelings because, like you said, if you take the time and you look at these things, then you can make an educated decision and make the choices that you need to make. But I hate to say, man, the ads, the marketing is very good. Um, some of the stuff, especially like you said, we were talking about social media. Now, social media, remember, back in the day, it was just like people's personal videos and stuff. No, you got to deal with the ad and the marketing in social media.

SPEAKER_06 25:11

That's right.

SPEAKER_01 25:12

Um, there was this, and just to make a point of this, Amazon, they had the first Black Friday football game. The interesting thing about it was this it wasn't just a normal football game. During the breaks at Hat, like during the little commercial break, they would show ads specific to things that you were looking at on their site and online. So certain food things you were looking at, certain things they wanted you to see, like Burger King, McDonald's, etc., it would come up on your feed followed by an item that you wanted to buy. Talking about dopamine hits, yeah. Like it was just that's right.

SPEAKER_00 25:45

It's a dopamine, but you know what the bad thing is too now. We start our children young now. We teach them bad habits in the beginning. And so one of the things that we uh have is that we have a grandson that we have raised, right? So his parents used to give him the bag of chips. So, and I've trained them like this, right? So, so yes, a snack. I said, Well, okay, that's what we're gonna do. And he didn't like it at first. I said, We're gonna put it in a little bowl and we're gonna portion it out. And then if you want a little more, it's okay. But I think that's one of the things that we do. We give them the bag or we give them the pack and let the bee out of it. As long as if it hit the dopamine of the brain or that gut, it's they're gonna eat the whole bag. Period. But up, and now he's nose. And he said, Tell me, he said, Mama, dude, I know when I'm full. And that's what you want. You want your children to recognize when they know they're full. Whoa, he's he really Yes, he has caught on to it.

SPEAKER_02 26:30

He's aware.

SPEAKER_00 26:31

Right. And so it's not about being obsessive. I don't believe in being obsessive and you know, always, you know, when I say that, like, you know, don't eat this, don't eat you know, this is the same.

SPEAKER_01 26:39

That's my wife's thing. Yeah, do you don't want to be obsessed? Beat yourself up. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 26:43

Just be realistic. Be realistic. Yes, a lot of times we just overdo everything. Yeah. And I I'm a person that try to balance a lot when it comes to my life. Not too much, but just right in the middle if I can. Now, sometimes I may be up here, sometimes I may be here. But one of the other things I want to talk about, mental illness, make sure we're in tune with our family mental illness. My young son struggled with mental health. And it's all because he won't go take the medicine, he won't get help. So a lot of us just don't do it. Talented, and he's a creative also. Okay. He's an artist, he paints, he draws, he's all that. But mental illness is really big that we don't pay attention to, especially in our community.

SPEAKER_01 27:16

We like look, diet, and just spray it away.

SPEAKER_00 27:19

That's right. Food has to do it a lot too. Um, but because the gut and the stomach is connected. They they connect, okay?

SPEAKER_01 27:26

I agree. I agree that I'm strong on on that. And um, that'll lead to me asking about this entrepreneurship that that you do um just with farming. Um and if you could expound on a little bit for us the importance of being able to, like, you don't have to be the like a super agricultural person, but like the ability to be able to grow like specific things in your house, whether it just be like herbs or small fruits and vegetables. Like, why is that important? And why do you consider that to be important?

SPEAKER_00 27:54

So I'm a part of a team called pharmacists, and um the young lady that runs is Benita Clemens. So we worked together with that's how I became a female farmer. See my blood, because my dad and my granddad, all of my uncles, all of them were farmers, and um, so when she um, you know, came and asked me to be a part of the group, I just thought it was amazing to bring back those memories. I love living in the future, but I like living in the past too, and I like I like it bringing them together, yeah. So my dad, like I said, all his brother, my grandfather, all of the female were farmers. And so I joined the organization with the group with uh Benita with pharmacists, and we farmed at um Clemson.

SPEAKER_06 28:33

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_00 28:34

And we did really good. So I always tell people, find what you like. Like we plant flowers, and that's awesome. So in my flower pots, I have broccoli and I have collard greens in it for the sea, right? And then I have all my herbs in my pots, and then I have raised beds that do herbs. And because I love herbs to season the food, but number one is two, I can use it in my charcuter box. So it's twofold.

SPEAKER_02 28:55

Oh I can't.

SPEAKER_00 28:56

So find like one if even if it starts out with one plant of a tomatoes, one plant of cucumber, spinach, whatever your favorite vegetable is, start out with just that. But herbs is a really good thing because it's also not only do it help us with our body because it's a cleanser, it clean, it clean that blood. Yes, it's medicine. Um, but I said just encourage everybody to do one thing that you really, really like and just start it, and then you'll just kind of grow. It's just like what we're talking about with exercising, eating healthy. Yeah, once you start with a little bit, your body kind of craves healthy. So my body craves healthy food.

SPEAKER_01 29:27

You want it? I want it. Yes, I want healthy. I don't need the potato chips.

SPEAKER_00 29:32

Right. But and I eat some that shall tell people I'm not perfected. I'm not perfection, I'm not shooting for perfection, but I'm shooting for balance as much as possible.

SPEAKER_01 29:40

Gotcha.

SPEAKER_00 29:40

So I have a chip I enjoy, but I don't eat the big old bag. I may eat a handful.

SPEAKER_01 29:44

Is that that's my big successful? That's why I do. I get my little, I get my little bowl, little dill chips in there and I eat them a little more like you love your chips. Because she'll tell you, when she first met me, the only thing I ate was chips and water.

SPEAKER_06 29:53

Really?

SPEAKER_01 29:54

Swear to you, that's all I had was because like I w I worked at a restaurant too, and um I would eat a lot. I don't know. I was I was teaching Nate about this. I was gonna eat standing, just eat my food and then go run, right? So whenever I was like at home, I didn't really want to eat heavy food or make anything. So I'll just have little chips and a little water.

SPEAKER_00 30:11

Right.

SPEAKER_01 30:11

And that'll be it. She's like, man, you didn't have no weight.

SPEAKER_00 30:14

I'm sad and that didn't make you gain weight, though. Really?

SPEAKER_01 30:17

Because I was always looking. I was always having to go, I probably walk 27 miles a week.

SPEAKER_00 30:23

That's it makes a difference too.

SPEAKER_01 30:25

And I told people the problem was this the numbers part.

SPEAKER_00 30:28

Yeah, it's not sure.

SPEAKER_01 30:29

So I was like skinny fat.

SPEAKER_00 30:31

Oh, that's a that's one.

SPEAKER_01 30:32

Yep, so like I was like a snoopdog. I had like the bad cholesterol, but I didn't have no weight on me. And they're like, no, how is this possible? And I was like, I just eat salt and vinegar, chips, and plain chips and water. They're like, well, you gotta eat something with nutrition. I wasn't taking supplements at that time. Um, and so I could tell, like, even for myself, I knew, okay, yeah, I have this type of energy and stuff like that, and I don't feel good here, there, and I'm not overweight or anything, but I could probably be better. And then um, I actually went and got those numbers, went to go see a doctor, and I realized, okay, I need to eat some fruits and vegetables, and I need to cook at home, right? And not just eat the food. Because this is one of the issues too. A lot of folks who work in the food and bed industry is that you'll eat a lot of the food left over from the restaurant. The problem is they use exorbitant amounts of butter, salt, sugar. Because, like you said, they're trying to keep people coming.

SPEAKER_00 31:24

Coming back, you gotta keep coming back.

SPEAKER_01 31:26

That's the secret. Why you think like you'll go to the restaurant? Oh, their food is just so much better than what I made. No, they're using more butter, sugar and salt than what you can use at home. So that's part of the reason why you're getting that effect. And um, when I realize that I go home and I cook them a little light stuff, light oil, like olive oil, whatever. I try to use uh butter as as um infrequently as possible, even though I love butter.

SPEAKER_00 31:47

Yeah, you can use some butter. I love butter, especially if it's good. Grass fan butter.

SPEAKER_01 31:50

I wouldn't say that you can use it. The tiny of butter does matter. Um, it makes a big difference. But um getting back to the farming, I know um we have our tomatoes coming out, and I was gonna I'm going ahead and pulling them off. Like I said, I'm gonna get them, I'm eating eat them by the green. Now I'm gonna do it now because like at first I was like, I'm gonna let them sit and write, but as you said, I could take them off, and if I want to let them right beside the house, that's right. So um, because we're at the end of that growing season, I don't want to lose my tomatoes.

SPEAKER_00 32:16

No, don't lose your tomatoes. That's all I'm working.

SPEAKER_01 32:18

The herbs, I wanted to touch on this point with you because since we're talking about farming and nutrition and well-being, um, there was an interesting article that I was reading about herbs, and this is why I think it's so important to be able to grow your own herbs.

SPEAKER_06 32:30

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 32:31

A lot of the companies who produce our herbs don't do it in a well-being manner. They're doing it in a manner to make money. This is what I talked about earlier. Like doing things just to make money is not always good. So there's some large companies like McCormick, etc., specifically during the holiday season, trying to get your spices, you're trying to get your herbs together so you can make this food to feed your family because you love them, not knowing that the way that they're producing these herbs and spices actually causes them to have carcinogens, absolutely, yeah, chemicals. And it and the crazy thing is it's not even secret, it's on the consumer bureau website, like the normal website, you're gonna read it. And they'll tell you, no, these are bad, these are bad, these are bad, these are good, these are good. And one of the biggest things they say on the site is that, well, if you can grow it at your house, it's easy, it's easy, it's easy to grow.

SPEAKER_00 33:17

And they nine times out of ten, you as long as you water your earth and put a little like blue, you can do organic um fertilizer, they grow and they flourish. Yeah, and rosemary is one of the biggest ones. I have a rosemary bush about the size of those whole things.

SPEAKER_01 33:29

It's like a nice weed, it's the best weed you'll ever have. Like it'll take over and be ready, but it smells good. You can use it. Yeah, it's good, good in your food. Um, the one thing I've always had a hard time growing.

SPEAKER_00 33:42

Now, basil's easy, it requires water.

SPEAKER_01 33:45

See, this is what I was wondering. I didn't want to ever want to overwater it. I had it, I had it burn one time, I froze it out one time, and I think I dried it out another time. Yeah, I'm going through basil plants.

SPEAKER_00 33:55

It's very temperamental. Now, I have that same problem with time.

SPEAKER_01 33:58

Time.

SPEAKER_00 33:58

Time is one that had my oregano, rosemary, basil, yeah, and chives are easy to grow.

SPEAKER_01 34:05

Chives, yes.

SPEAKER_00 34:06

And sage is very easy to grow.

SPEAKER_01 34:08

And it's amazing.

SPEAKER_00 34:09

Right. Now, do you put you put your basil in the sun too much too hot?

SPEAKER_01 34:12

I think I did. See, that's what I said. I put it in the sun too much one time, and I know I burned it. I took it from the sun and I was like, hey, I'm gonna make sure it gets watered. I think I overwatered it.

SPEAKER_00 34:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 34:21

And then another time I think it was just too cold.

SPEAKER_00 34:25

Yeah, it dies in cold. It did come back too. I didn't realize that.

SPEAKER_01 34:28

I didn't know that either. It won't, yeah. If your basil basil dies during the winter months, it's not a bad thing. It won't come back. Don't throw that plant out.

SPEAKER_00 34:36

Right, but the freezer, um, um, the cold weather does freeze down. Yeah, you don't want to get a frost on it. Yeah, so some of them do live um in the winter time, and you just have to find out which ones do. But like I said, my rosemary sage and a regular data fruit does very good. And some of them will die out, but they come back. Yeah, yeah. So, and the chives is a very good one too. Parsley is a good one, and you're gonna use it. You're gonna use them, you're gonna use them.

SPEAKER_01 34:56

So, don't give up on your herbs. No, growth. Plant your herbs, grow your herbs, and and even with that, like um, there are some plants and vegetables, specifically certain vegetables more so than fruit. You can grow them in your house, like indoors. And I tell people why um, if you have the ability to do that, do so, specifically here in South Carolina. Right. We're in a pretty good region where we have a pretty long growing season.

SPEAKER_00 35:20

That's right, we do. And find out all you gotta do is find out what I like for people to do is grow, grow what they like, first of all. Okay, and then just kind of study that one thing. And it's really easy and simple. But the soil is the most important thing. It's gotta be the rich soil, yeah. Just like we're talking about the food, like the body. Your soil. And also, too, that's a good example for your plants. If you don't water them and take care of them, it's just like your body. They dry up, they don't, they, they, they struggle, they turn brown, and so that means that we have different kinds of diseases that come about us. And like I said, some of the stuff is preventable. I'm gonna give it my all. I'm gonna do everything I possibly can. And another thing, too, I tell people about how I live my life and try to live healthy and still look good, is that I don't let things stress me out with people. Good point. So that is one about that. We carry other people's baggage on our back. And sometimes we just can't help it. Sometimes it's our personality, you know. But all you can do is I basically pray for my children and my son. That that's one of the struggles we have in our families with my son but mental. You don't say that bothers us, you know. But we pray for him and we help take help.

SPEAKER_01 36:21

Yep. As best you can. Yeah, as best we can.

SPEAKER_00 36:24

That's right.

SPEAKER_01 36:24

So um, and I'm happy that you're saying that, specifically with stress, because another thing in black community we don't realize is um stress actually produces a hormone that kind of kills you.

SPEAKER_00 36:38

Kind of kills you, that's right.

SPEAKER_01 36:39

Cortisol, like it's not good for you.

SPEAKER_00 36:41

Right.

SPEAKER_01 36:41

And um, making sure that you're in a position where you know what you can handle, you don't take off more than you can chew. Meaning, some things you gotta, and this is the the religious aspect, sometimes you gotta let God let God.

SPEAKER_00 36:52

That's why I say we pray. Yeah, so that's what I do.

SPEAKER_01 36:55

You can't do, or you give it to somebody who is um certified and has the degree to make sure that they do the proper thing. But like you said, you gotta make sure you hire the right person. Right person you fire them.

SPEAKER_00 37:06

And some people don't want help though.

SPEAKER_01 37:07

Yeah, that's true. And you can't force it on them. Yeah, they have to be ready to receive help. If not, you're gonna waste your time in theirs. Yeah, that's a very good point.

SPEAKER_00 37:15

And some of us live in this thing too, which I uh saw the interview with Felicity Huff. Huffy, I Huff meant the one that did uh um the thing with the with her daughter.

SPEAKER_06 37:25

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:25

And I listen to that woman say this just like this right here. She says that that was one that did the scandal with the college thing. Yes, yes, and what it was sort of the scandal thing, but it was what she said. And she said, I wanted to give my daughter the best opportunity she could. But this is where she got me at. Even if it meant breaking the law. When I heard that.

SPEAKER_01 37:50

That was kind of uh Yeah, that's yeah, yeah, that's scandalous. That was scandalous. Because like you don't even know if the child wants it.

SPEAKER_00 37:57

That's right. That's one thing. And the other thing is, we other people that qualify was booted out because you were paying.

SPEAKER_01 38:04

Because you're paying, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:05

And that, and now that stuff I don't like on fairness like that.

SPEAKER_01 38:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:08

One thing you I'm I'm a very fair person, you know.

SPEAKER_01 38:10

Because y'all are so hard working.

SPEAKER_00 38:11

Right, yeah, I'm very fair now, I'm telling you. But and a lot of time with young people, too, I find is they want everything done for them. And I watch you and Kevin, how you guys work. You guys work, and see, y'all have to get working. And I think that's why I connect with you guys because I see what you do. You can't expect to get something if you're not willing to put into work.

SPEAKER_02 38:27

Good point.

SPEAKER_00 38:28

I mean, you gotta give something, right? You know, like even when we're at the space, entrepreneurs that's want to do something and want to move, if they'll come in and they want to use the space, we're normally giving them space free. But we always ask them that you have to at least purchase $350 of food. $350. So the space is free, right? Space is free. But you so you can't get free and free. Yeah, no, you know, you got to give something that's fine. Yes, you cannot expect to build your business to do it free because that's not where it is.

SPEAKER_01 38:58

Because you wouldn't want your business to be right, that's right.

SPEAKER_00 39:01

And when you put it in, you have what they call the scan in the game, then.

SPEAKER_01 39:04

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_00 39:05

So that's why I tell people that, you know, like whatever their price is, I pay for it. But I did have a conversation with a young lady at an event that last night, she does um website building. So I talked to her about it, and I said, you know, one of the biggest struggles that we have as entrepreneurs is that um some of the things we can't afford. Or some things are too pricey, we're priced out. That's true. She was building a website, and so I said, What uh what is your price of building a website? It's time for me to update my website. And um, and I told her, I want to own my website. A lot of people that build a website, they take your website and you don't have no control over it. Now, get it, I get the monthly fee and all that. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about um the part that she said it costs anywhere from three to five thousand dollars to build a website. Now, as a young entrepreneur, I think that that's priced out for them.

SPEAKER_02 39:53

That is.

SPEAKER_00 39:53

So we gotta be aware of the winner situation, but to make sure that it's comfortable for them. Say, for example, if somebody comes in and have an event like last night, Jamie, Jamie Drew had an event, and we gave her the space at no cost. She ordered $350,000 for her guests because you're gonna feed them anyway.

SPEAKER_01 40:10

Yeah, you have to, it's best thing to take care of the guests always.

SPEAKER_00 40:13

So we did a nice Mediterranean bar for her, and they was very happy. And then, of course, she purchased drinks that she wants from or whatever, but it's affordable. Yeah, so you didn't have the four to five hundred dollar rental fee plus the three hundred, four hundred dollar food fee. And then she would able to make money. That's right.

SPEAKER_02 40:29

You would have paid over a thousand dollars, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 40:32

And the reason why we do that is a way for us giving back to entrepreneurs because I know the ends of entrepreneurs, I've been an entrepreneur since, like I said, 18 years old.

SPEAKER_06 40:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 40:39

Um, and we have tried to help number husband. You know, he's like a numbers guy. He said, Well, you gotta remember too, you gotta pay the bills here, also bills.

SPEAKER_06 40:47

Exactly. So we try to be bills.

SPEAKER_00 40:49

Yeah, we try to be within reason. And we, you know, we do like helping entrepreneurs, but they gotta have to drive the one to help themselves.

SPEAKER_01 40:56

And I have all right, this actually leads directly into the the next question about bridging the gap because um, and you we know this, we've talked about this. Literally, we I know you have this conversation with my brother, but a lot of folks in our community we always complain about the lack of support opportunities that we receive from the elders. Um, and that's one of the things that I really I know gravitated us to you all, uh, was the fact that you all understood that and understood the need to make sure that like they like they always say, when you when you're going up, when I'm going up, I'm gonna be pulling you up. As you push, you push me, I'm gonna pull you, right? And in our community, lots of times we don't see that. I watch other communities, whether it be Latin community, um, Asian community, um, white community, um, doesn't matter who it is, they do a really good job of making sure that they take and push while the other person's pulling. They get them in, they make sure that they take care of them, they look out for them, give them a chance so that they can grow, right? Once they grow, they make sure to get back, right? Um, why is it important for individuals such as yourself to help bridge that gap? And what recommendations would you give to younger generations um when they're trying to connect with their elders, when they're reaching out to try to make those.

SPEAKER_00 42:05

Um so I think I think one thing is for me personally, um, like I said, I'm very I watch everything, I listen to everything. And then what if I don't hear I say, yeah, my husband does, right? So I always look at when a person, when I meet a person, first of all, they gotta make sure their appearance is right. You can't come no place looking on any kind of way. Now that's just the way it goes. That's how we're doing it. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, that's real. You cannot do it. That is real, okay?

SPEAKER_01 42:30

You can't come in here with it. Yeah, you have tattoos on your face, you're not well kept, pants aren't on your waist, realize there's gonna be judgment made. It doesn't matter.

SPEAKER_00 42:38

Right. So every morning I get up, I'm intentional. Okay. I make sure my hair is done.

SPEAKER_01 42:42

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 42:43

I make sure my makeup is on, and I make sure my clothes is clean and I'm you know, I'm I'm fit. I'm not pressing spread a lot of perfume on because that's kind of turnoff too. Yeah, but um, those things I make sure I do it. I'm intentional, so I set enough time out. I get my sleeping night, my six to seven hours sleep. I'm shooting for seven. So when I get up, I'm resting. So you gotta come rest it. You can't come yon it. And one thing is a big turnoff a lot of young. I've never, and I think that's why I like you guys too. Y'all don't come here smell like no pot.

SPEAKER_01 43:10

No, no, okay.

SPEAKER_00 43:11

Now don't go nobody's job smelling like no pot. I'm coming here doing a business venture, smelling like pot.

SPEAKER_01 43:16

Very, very true. Very that is very difficult. Especially in this day and age with the legalization of certain things, and um, they have certain things that you can do that are okay in the state. It doesn't matter. You like I wouldn't want you to come and smell like tobacco.

SPEAKER_00 43:30

No, that's right. So you gotta think about not just yourself, how am I being presented, how am I being received? Like I say, everybody that stepped through that door, you won't believe it. I have already scanned them. Not judgmental, yeah. Okay, yeah, because if you're a professional, I want you to portray yourself as very true. People that I work with, I said now this is what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna give you 110%. I want you to do your best. Give me your best, right? You guys have done that, and that's why I have gravitated towards you guys. Understand. Because you're professional, you come in, you got all your equipment, you ain't nickel and diamond about it, you ain't coming with half one light. Come on now. If you're gonna do it, do it right. If you need help, reach out. Yeah, and if your family know that you're serious, they'll help you whatever. Oh, they will, or save your money. Yeah, that's one thing I'm wearing. I save my money. I save my money and get whatever.

SPEAKER_01 44:18

You can save that money.

SPEAKER_00 44:20

Yes, right. You can't be wearing the Gucci shoes and all that. Now, mind you, I wear Gucci belts. Yeah, I live in a mansion, I drive Mercedes. Yeah, I drive Lexus, but every last bit of we have worked for. Yeah, we have given back. Not bragging because everything we do, you can do too.

unknown 44:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 44:38

You understand what I'm saying? Yeah. Me and my husband have worked for everything. We don't ask for nobody nothing, and we just do our job and we do it well. So come in, being presentable. That's the way you can better grab. Because a lot of time, older people. That's something I don't live in. But I'm gonna see how you present yourself, how you carry yourself, and what you do. Because we as a black community, we are known to be lazy, we're known to be late, we're known to do not a good job.

SPEAKER_01 45:04

And I know a lot of the youth will say, Oh my lord, the excuses, you'll hear. But I'm gonna say like this one of the coolest things that did occur in my life. Like, you take you take a take lemons and um we had to live with my grandmother for a few years, and the one thing that was cool about it was understanding her point of view of how you should work and what work athletics. One thing I remember this sticks in my head is not getting out of here. I remember I had like the clothes that came like from school, clothes, I just like put them on the couch or whatever it was, and I was sitting there on the couch and she looked at me and she didn't like she didn't yell and I she didn't look at me.

SPEAKER_03 45:45

Oh, what's that? I said, Oh, clothes. She said, okay.

SPEAKER_01 45:50

She said, is that furniture? I said, nope. She said, and why is it sitting right there? Like it's saying, take that and put that in the what's it? Fold it up, put it where it's supposed to go.

SPEAKER_02 46:02

And it stuck with me from this day.

SPEAKER_01 46:03

I'm like, oh, so things are supposed to be in specific places. That's right. There's something called order. And you're supposed to make sure things aren't chaotic. Right. And if you do that, you can live a good life. That's the lesson that I learned from that. And from being around her, like we knew we had um in we take our bath, get ready, had our clothes, like I said, being intentional, our clothes ready to go for school in the morning, things prepped where they're supposed to be at. When we got back, you took that off, you changed into your play club. That's right. Like Mr. Rogers does. You can't do it. Take those shoes off, put the right ones on. You have yourself because what you realize is it allows you to care for things and make sure that you are um mindful of your time. It teaches time management. Right. You're not out here um ever rushing or struggling. I remember she used to cook dinner for Saturday. And this is part of the old school way of doing things, but I understood why she did it Saturday night, right? She'll let us stay up, we watch a little showtime at Apollo and stuff, right? She would um dinner for Sunday dinner on Saturday night, have it waiting in the up for Sunday when we got back at so we don't have to work.

SPEAKER_00 47:07

Right, right.

SPEAKER_01 47:08

And I understood what people say about the Sabbath now, why you don't work, because that's a day that you plan to be what? Restful.

SPEAKER_00 47:14

That's right. And that's what we do now. As busy as we are, and you know, the things that we have going on, we normally take Sunday to work. Now, some if something comes up, we don't mind. It's what I'm saying, you know, now times we're gonna take Sunday to work and Monday we're working hard. So we try to have everything where it's in decent and order. So go back to bridging the gap. If you if you're a young person, you know, and not so much prove yourself, but be intentional about being professional. Like I say, your parents has a lot to do with it.

SPEAKER_06 47:41

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 47:42

And the way you carry yourself has a lot to do with it. And so that's why a lot of times elders will turn off.

SPEAKER_06 47:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:47

And like I say, they uh, you know, a lot, and I'm not like people smoke your weed, pot, whatever you do is fine. Okay, but don't come to a job interview or to a job around a networking event smelling like pot.

SPEAKER_05 47:59

Yeah, it's just not professional, not at all.

SPEAKER_00 48:01

Because what you're doing, you know, you just bringing your whatever you got going on onto somebody else. Some people may be allergic to that kind of thing.

SPEAKER_01 48:07

Very true.

SPEAKER_00 48:07

And I doctors even have you now, you can't even wear perfume in doctor's office.

SPEAKER_01 48:10

That's what, no, I was about to say, because you know I work in the office, and I I had learned this, um, and I tell people this all the time. Have a provider, she's uh allergic to um corn. She can't even be around popping corn. So what I tell people is like, no, it matters. And and when when you come to work, one of our big things is you can wear, we have a really nice dress code or whatnot, but it's not too strict. One of the things we always tell people is just watch your scent because you can have something on and it can literally strike in a reaction. Now we're having somebody going to anaphylactic strike um uh syndrome, and we're like, oh Lord Jesus, we have to now keep this person from dying. And they're like, for real, I'm like, yes, this is real. So um we have patients that sometimes come, I'm telling you, man, and they'll be smelling high high.

SPEAKER_00 48:53

Oh, so you familiar with that too, then you're not sure.

SPEAKER_03 48:55

Yes, yes, and I'm just like, and I'll tell the patient, I'll pull this person to the side sometimes because sometimes there'll be a young African-American person, and I'll pull them to the side of the gentleman I was helping with some medical records.

SPEAKER_01 49:05

I understand that you do what you need to do, etc. But when you come in a place like this, just make sure you aren't smelling like this that you because people are gonna perceive you a certain way. You aren't gonna get the help that you want or the service that you're expecting. I understand, so I'm gonna be a little different, but realize if I'm not here and if I wasn't here, you'd be dealing more than likely with somebody that didn't look like you're all the demographic, and you come in looking like that, they're gonna not gonna be that happy to deal with you. And he understood, and he said, Man, I apologize. I just didn't realize I came out, I couldn't smell it. I'm like, yeah, because when you use that stuff, you can't smell it no more. You can't smell it more. Because I tell people you can't smell it, you don't know you smell like that. Like if you're a person and you change smoke with a point to the point where smoke follows you wherever you go, you're walking around looking like nuts, you got that little dust cloud with you, it's stuck to your body. So um, for the youth, and I know whenever they're dealing um with our elders and stuff, you do have to remember, make sure you're presentable, that you have a good smell to you. And this is weird to say it like this, but this is something that is a part of employment, um employment um what's it called? Uh uh verification or or um not even just a verification employment, but uh a status quo thing. So, like whenever we do readiness, work readiness to y'all working. You know why? Because this is what he does.

SPEAKER_00 50:28

I love it.

SPEAKER_01 50:29

I'm telling you I'll tell my brother um because yesterday I was doing some uh annual performance reviews for my employees. And when these employees are actually older than me, she actually retired and came back to the workforce, right? And then there's another employees my age. And in doing these things, I go tell Kevin, he's like, Yeah, yeah, it's like first time you've been in like like a this type of supervisor, but I was like, Yeah, it's funny because like I'm talking to these people, I'm gonna have to ask them, judge them on whether or not they have a good body odor.

SPEAKER_00 50:53

Right. It makes a difference.

SPEAKER_01 50:55

It's a perfect, and then people are like, for real, is this a joke? I'm like, no, it's the actual rubric, great. I have to give them. Do they come to work ready to work, presentable, smelling properly, without odor in their area? They're like it's one thing, it's a real thing, it will keep you from getting a raise.

SPEAKER_00 51:10

That's right. And keep from getting a job. Yes. And keep from getting a client, or lose a client, or lose a client. Let me tell you something. If they come to me, it smells like I don't want nothing dealing with it. Okay, and another thing that for for um a millennial entrepreneurs, too, if you say you can do something, do something. Do it, do it on the touch of words. And if you can't be straight up and honest. So we had an event here, South African tasting, and I was back there rushing, making the dessert, and I don't know if I told you, all of it fell on the floor.

SPEAKER_01 51:39

Oh no.

SPEAKER_00 51:41

I had it was crazy. So I went up front, I had 55 guests, yeah, and I told them this is the life of a chef. I said, I was back there making this amazing Marvel South African pudding. And as I went to mix the liquid and the dry and wet ingredients together, yeah, all of it fell on the floor. I told him just like this round. And I said that my husband has made a dessert run. We're gonna have South African Marvel pudding, but my husband's going to get some dessert. But if you want to come back Tuesday, I will make dessert for anybody that wants to. It's a paper pass around, put your name on it, I'll even deliver it to you. Or you can pick it up. So 20 people of the guest, they came back and they had the marble pudding ready for them.

SPEAKER_01 52:22

Yeah, so they could get the that's what I said.

SPEAKER_00 52:25

Because I'm a woman of my word, yeah, yeah, and I want your experience to be great. I apologize, but it just happened. And they just laughed at me.

SPEAKER_02 52:31

See, but because you were what? You were real and straight up.

SPEAKER_00 52:34

That's right. That's right. Just be straight up and then like don't be afraid of it. Don't be afraid of it. And like I said, one thing about me, any entrepreneur can reach out to me. I open the door for them to reach out to me, yeah. Any advice I can give them. Because, and then, like me, I'm gonna look for mentors myself. Never be to a point that you know everything and you can't learn from it. I learn from you guys, I learned from young people, I learned from little kids. Yeah, because I'm open-minded, got it. You know, don't be closed-minded that you know everything and it's all about you, it's not because there's always somebody to bet them and somebody can do it better than you, right? Yeah, so but and I tell people confidence is one of the things I work on really strong on, meaning that I have confidence. And I always get like people to give me feedback. And Kevin, tell you, if it's something that I didn't you didn't like, let me know. I can I'm communicate well. Yeah, don't take it as an insult. Yeah, that's the way to help.

SPEAKER_01 53:22

Oh, that's one of the biggest. I'm gonna tell you this. And I'm happy that you're saying I always like to people need to hear it from the horse's mouth. Um, specifically when uh with the youth dealing with um with elders and leadership. For you to say something like that, them to hear that helps bolster their understanding. And I tell people all the time, man, you can't be afraid to communicate.

SPEAKER_00 53:43

Right.

SPEAKER_01 53:44

And I think that's one of the issues that are the younger generations of that's a skill set they need to work on.

SPEAKER_00 53:50

Man, because I need to put a workshop like that. We have you guys coming, we need to work on that because you gotta communicate.

SPEAKER_01 53:55

You have to. You have to. We were discussing this earlier today. People think that the youth, because they use technology and that they're on the on the um the social media and stuff, that they're great communicators. No, no, but by all means, what it actually does is actually almost like a crutch to keep them from having to do real communication, right? Which I like to call, I always like to call it, um, I affectionately call it hand-to-hand conversation.

SPEAKER_00 54:18

Hand-handed conversation.

SPEAKER_01 54:19

People like, what is that? I'm like, that's you getting down with a person and actually talking to them in their face and being comfortable doing it and sharing your experience and not um not not like being able to being able to properly convey what is in your mind, bring it out in verbal form, and not being afraid of saying certain things or communicating properly. I'll tell you like this, I was talking to some folks at my um place of appointment at Canada, and I I do a lot of, it's weird, I do a lot of counseling when I'm at work, okay, um, but it makes sense. Um it's necessary, specifically when you're in a leadership management role, you shouldn't do that. You should be uh aware that you're gonna have to do that. I had an employee that I was speaking with, and I told her the importance of communicating. Like she was dealing with a very um sensitive situation, and she was trying to keep it hidden from people because she was gonna try to fix it herself. I thought I said, Hey, the more you let people know, the more we understand what's going on with you, we're more able to assist, and we won't judge you or offensive, you won't get a strike or a mark against you, or get a call to human resources because such and such is not here. This is not going on. If we know what's going on, we can do what? Protect you, we can shield you, we can offer you help. I'm gonna tell you how again God works in mysterious ways. I told this person you need to speak to this one particular person because she is your real, she is the boss. You need to speak to her because she has certain connections and abilities that I do not have that she can offer. I'm telling you this past week she she came back to me and she was like, You were right. I did not know what you meant by that, but I took your advice and I did it. And she showed me where the person helped them out in a strong way. I'm saying I said in a strong way. They weren't even looking for this blessing. But because they communicated and let the person know what was going on. This is an elder. This person is in the community, they work and do um a lot of uh work with churches and etc. They were able to bring them a blessing that they needed that took a lot of stress off of their body off their back and gives them the ability to now take care of their children better, not be stressed out to work, feel comfortable and confident because I tell you, especially during this time of year, being in a position where you may lose house, home, car, or et cetera, is not a good feeling.

SPEAKER_00 56:31

It's not a good feeling.

SPEAKER_01 56:32

It doesn't allow you to be able to go out there and do your work and do what is necessary for you to be on the up and up and um to be able to get a blessing from somebody that takes that stress away from you. And it just be tied to the fact that you just needed to talk.

SPEAKER_00 56:47

Talk. We didn't talk. That's right. And I like that. I like that. And that's what we have to do. We have to be able to communicate. I did uh a class with six young girls, and I think they're between 11 and 13. And the communication, I was shocked because you know I'm upbeat, happy, and all that, and then they just kind of like no, uh-uh, yeah, that social media, you know what I'm saying? Because all they look, they talk. So we got to really get back to the basics of pymmonship and also talking and communicating. Yes. And I think it's left to the not just the teachers, it's left to the parents to be able to communicate with our children.

SPEAKER_01 57:18

Because that's where we used to work with the other. That's right. That's what we need to do.

SPEAKER_00 57:20

That's right, that's right. And any skill set that you need, it's all kind of free things out here now that you can get, you know. But if you want to invest in your education, also things you can pay for. I'm an investor when it comes to that knowledge and education and stuff like that. And then I still like to learn. Yeah, I'm interested in learning. We went and did an event the other night, and it was a beautiful grazing table for a leak group of ladies. And the young lady that had the venue, I want to reach out to her and I want to say, I want you to mentor me. I want you to critique my work. Let me know what I could have done better, just to see. Because she's at a level where she does these all these big fancy events and stuff like that. And I like to learn for people that can point to. I'm not interested in learning her secrets. Yeah, I want to critique me. You know what I'm saying? Tell me how I could be better, what I can do better. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 58:10

Yeah, you don't want to be able to do that. Because it's all about it's not about taking it.

SPEAKER_00 58:13

No, no, it's all about how can I do better, what can I do better. Because my whole mission, like I said, and I'm telling millennials, young people, yes, if you're gonna be seek out to be entrepreneurship, even at your job, whatever you do, do your best at it. Don't just do it. Do your best.

SPEAKER_05 58:27

Do it too. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 58:28

And if you're not gonna do it best, don't do it at all.

SPEAKER_02 58:30

Yep. You're wasting your time.

SPEAKER_00 58:31

You waste your time, and then people are not gonna hire you because you didn't give you your best. And sometimes I always tell people too, I always have to do 110%. Sometimes as African Americans, we have to do extra. If it is, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 58:44

200.

SPEAKER_00 58:45

Right, right. You know, because that's just the way society acts. And it's wrong.

SPEAKER_01 58:50

But until we own the until you own everything from top to bottom.

SPEAKER_00 58:56

That's right.

SPEAKER_01 58:57

Understand where you are.

SPEAKER_00 58:58

Right. And I tell people too, a lot of times people go into like entrepreneurship, and that's solely their thing. I always say, you know, I'm still in the beauty industry, right?

SPEAKER_06 59:07

That's true.

SPEAKER_00 59:07

That's because I know that's guaranteed money, even if my slow days a week brings them together. But you got to find the time. Some jobs are so demanded that you almost can't do anything on the side. You know what I'm saying? So you got to find that balance. And like I said, I'm open to discuss that with any entrepreneur that call me. Reach out to me, you know. If they need a nugget, need advice, you know, I'm I'm willing to give it. And I think it's a lot of, like you say, bridging that gap. Because I believe in bringing some of the old and new. We can't be too, you know, they can't be. Well, I just want to do everything new. You got to have some of that and bring that in. That you don't do right, you gotta bring it in.

SPEAKER_01 59:42

You have to still do that. You gotta bring it as well, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 59:45

And then, like I say, just like what I do, I sit and watch people, right? You can tell who is that person that you can kind of lean on. Um, but I was real, real disappointed. I had one of the young ladies that was on the podcast with me, and she has been trying to start on business, and she has been trying to reach out to different people in the community, everything. And I was disappointed in the fact that she said she went to one of the um sit officials and they was trying to proposition her to have sex. Oh my gosh, that bothered me to the max, okay? Breaking down that, yeah, that that's that's wrong. So, you know, we have you gotta watch. And if something you're normally intuition, you gotta tell your yeah, it will, it will, you gotta tell, yeah, but you gotta listen to it. That's right. Yeah, and so I think that's how many, so many girls like in Hollywood and this music industry got caught up. That's called selling your soul to the devil, preach, preach, preach, you know, but it's wrong because they're taking advantage too.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:44

Yeah, you don't use that's not the way to that's right.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:48

You shouldn't have to trade something to get something, you know what I'm saying? All money ain't good money, yeah. It ain't good money, and when you're gonna be able to do that, that's right. When I come in, I always we're professional, and I don't give nobody inclination that I you I'm looking for anything else. Yep, I'm looking for you. If you hire me a job, I'm gonna do your job and I'll do 110, and that's what it's about. Then you pay for my service, boom. So I don't go and looking at money. I think money has been one of the things, too, that has blinded and covered the eyes. Oh it's all about the money, it's about the money, but you got to do the job to get yeah, and and as you know, it says in the good book, it's the love of money, it's not money.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:20

Because money's a tool, right? Money's a tool, it's just used to do things, and I tell people it's not the it's not the issue. Like, if you say you're a millionaire, you got money, that's not the problem. That's not the problem. The problem is the love of money, like to the point where you love money over humanity, humanity, or doing the right thing, or doing the right thing, you know, you know, living by taking care of yourself, yeah. Take care, you start seeing it deteriorate the person or community. That's why when you see um one of the biggest things I always know growing up in this era, um, between um in the era of crack, I always tell people that was watching the love of money because the the issue is they weren't selling the crack because they were trying to uplift their community, so they were selling it because they wanted money, money.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:59

That's the only reason, and then another thing, too. I try to educate people on too, especially young people, um, with the drug use of fifth and all pot. Yeah, I mean, um, crack, cocaine, all that. Now remember the person that's giving it or selling to you, they don't care nothing about you.

unknown 1:02:17

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:18

Period. Exactly. I mean, you can think about it, they can pretend they don't care nothing about you. So I always tell people that be careful of that because all they care about is money. Now, mind you, remember, I grew up very sheltered. I grew up with my my dad, not I don't know things, and I even went when I went to Detroit with my husband, they were drinking out of red cups. I ain't no red coast. I didn't know what was in the red cup. What's that red?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:40

I didn't know what the whole song was about that red solo cup.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:44

What's the red cup? I'll take one of the other cups. But they have a shelter, you know what I'm saying? I never um did drugs, I never um smoked. Now I had a boyfriend that at one time gave me what you call a micotop, right? That was first time. I ain't touching a drug today. I don't know if you don't ever make it.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:01

Yeah, nothing like that. Yeah, that message right there. So you're probably like, what is this?

SPEAKER_00 1:03:04

Yeah, it's kept my night. I ain't never touched a drug again. But then um, I was put in a situation where I was working at a salon and I was like 21, 22 years old. And so this is how people get caught up. This easy, just like this right here. So we had a snack room, and I tell the story because I want people to be aware what's going on if they surround it. So we have a snack room. So I walk in and they snort and coke. And so I said, What you don't you want to try something deuce right here? This is how easy it is. Paul was saying, Don't try it. The devil was saying, Why don't you just give it a try? Yeah, it could tell one time I could have been a drug addict just like that. That's very and I said, No, thank you. Close that door and when I and that was the best decision I ever made in my whole life. Ever, ever, ever. So this is not stuff presented to your children. Why don't you try that? Yeah, they try it, and that's it.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:51

That's it.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:52

So I don't look down on people that addict to anything because I always tell people I'm addicted to sugar.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:57

Yeah, it is a way of substance. I think that dirt sugar is dangerous.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:02

Oh man, yeah, it is, it's very addictive. That doesn't mean that all addictions basically just hit the brain, yeah, and you want that film, but I tell people to tell that story that I could easily, so I but health nut they end up being the most unhealthy pure person, and then I'm a professional that I could have been drug added just like that. You're a real person, just like that, okay. And I say that to say too, I had a colleague that was she's one, and now you know, I'm gonna give her the credit, she was one of the baddest hairstylist in Columbia, South Carolina, but she started using drugs and tore down her whole body, her whole self. If I could see her now, I she probably I wonder if she even lived in number one. I'm talking about one of the baddest hairstylists coloring, cut. I mean, she was awesome, but that one person could have introduced her to something.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:46

Yeah, I like that you're telling this story because it's good for the easy kid is that the elders had to go through the same temptations, trials, and tribulations, right? That did stuff that stuff has not changed, it may have different forms, like instead of smoking cigarettes now, you may be smoking a vape, right? Um, you may not be taking a tab, but you might be taking one of those little molly pills, right? But it's the same stuff, and the fact that, like you said, if if you can do it, they can do it.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:15

But that has motived me, though. That has molded me to have a story to tell.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:18

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:19

And how to say, you know, when they say just say no, it is true. Just say no.

SPEAKER_06 1:05:22

Just say no.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:23

So I struggle now because I have grands, yeah, and I don't really want them to, you know, to you know, to deal with that. So my nine-year-old, I tell them, I said, um, if somebody approached you, and that's we got the role play. So we can't prevent everything, of course. We know we can't. You can give them the education.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:36

Yep, you can put them in a position so they can understand what it is.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:39

That's right. And the same thing with young entrepreneurs or millennials or whatever. We can give them the tools, but you can't be lazy. You gotta have self-motivated, preach. You gotta be able to get up, preach, and you know, get it done. Say, get it. And you gotta be done. Yes, you gotta be a person of your word.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:53

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:53

And so we got to debunk those myths that we have as African-American entrepreneurs.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:58

Yeah, because we aren't.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:59

I think lazy, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:01

Yes, it begins with us. It begins with us.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:03

I tell people I'll tell you like this: I'm the hardest, I'm usually, especially where I work, they'll tell you, man, they're like, Do you ever not work? You take time off, please take some vacation. Man, you have a whole, like I said, I had a whole, I have a whole month of PTO. They're like, bruh, like, don't come to work. And I'll be at work on a weekend, etc. And I'm laughing at these people when they come in stressed about work. I'm like, y'all ain't doing that. You're like, really? I'm like, no. Even my my our operational director will tell you, yeah, he was in here until 7:30 last night. I left and he was still here working.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:34

Yeah, I like my job.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:35

I like doing it. And like I said, I was raised that certain way that if you want to get you know, you're gonna have to work. Um, and speaking of this, this brings us to our final question. It's one of the most important things, especially for for us millennials, just to hear this from other folks is about work-life balance. Um, like being able to take care of others is a blessing.

SPEAKER_05 1:06:53

Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:53

Can you explain how you take care of yourself and maintain your work life balance? Because you do a lot.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:58

Right. And so, um, okay, like when I say I do a lot, like so when I'm concentrating. So right now, I'm once I get off the podcast view, I'm going to concentrate on two cadence jobs. Nothing else I'm thinking about. So, this is how I work it. So, I'm gonna make sure I get their job done 110%. Just job done 110%. Then I go home, relax, and chill out, do my work, do what job. And I try not to overbook myself.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:18

Okay. So that is one thing.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:20

Overbook yourself. You gotta think about that. You gotta think about how many hours in a day, what days you want to work, and what hours you want to work. And you keep it like that. So mind you, I do do extra stuff. Like last Thursday, not last Wednesday, uh, I have a client that's a return client all the time. Um, she's real good. And she needed us to deliver her boards. And so we was at a house at 11 o'clock Wednesday night. But that's just something I do for special people, special.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:44

Special, special situation.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:46

Not all the time now. I'm not gonna be able to do every night doing that. Yeah. So I believe in that work by balance to sleep.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:52

Uh-huh.

unknown 1:07:52

Eat.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:53

Because you're gonna get your six or seven. Drink your water.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:54

That's right. Drink your water.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:55

Um, tell me drinking the water part. And I guess that goes to like earning sugar again. But drinking water. Oh my goodness. People always ask me, hey man, why don't you look like you're getting older? And stuff like that. Because I'll ask them about my age, and I'll tell my age, they look like baby, why? I'm like, I drink water and I try to do wrong to people. They just really I drink water.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:16

And no, you can't fix every problem. You can't, you can't fix everything. You can't fix everybody.

SPEAKER_06 1:08:21

No, you can't.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:22

I had to learn that too, because when when I learned about my son, I was in very deny. I was very denied that no, I'm not gonna, you know, that's not what's going on, you know, that kind of thing. Be realistic, yeah. And so one day I watch him, I said, that is what we got right now. And we're gonna deal with, like I said, my husband, take very good care of him. And I kind of keep myself around things that kind of sad me and break down. And I guess sometimes I don't think that's realistic, but that's what keep me going. So some things make us depressed. Think about what may have happened to our child, it makes us depressed. Yeah, not eating health, it makes us depressed. So we bring a lot of stuff on ourselves because we, you know, may have the genetics of it, you know. But I always feel if you got any kind of issue, help, go get helpful. Don't just try to deal with it yourself. Like I can't went up and why I know he worked at the the place where I went down.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:11

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So y'all know, yeah, just claim right there this claim right. I know who she is, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:16

Right. So I walked in there now. Oh, how you doing? Whatever. Go in there, I've been having problems with my knees, right? And it's because it may because you know I've been working on my knees for 40 years. Right, right. And so I watch people, they hop around, right? Some of them may have got it fixed, but some people don't want to go to the doctor to get the knee fixed.

SPEAKER_06 1:09:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:34

So when I was having this problem, I was proactive. I done waited two years. I didn't wait yeah, yeah. Okay, don't go to my doctor, which is prevent proactive. Yeah, I have a doctor proactive. I'm complaining about my knee. She said, okay, well, let's schedule X-ray. Right, schedule X-ray, schedule X-ray, it shows up nothing. I said, okay. And I'm very, I'm very smart in the children when it comes to stuff. I said, well, okay, well, what about MRI? I'm asking her for M RI. She said, okay, MRI, discover to have tormenis. So I said, I'm not gonna wait, go ahead and set me up.

SPEAKER_06 1:10:02

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:03

And I won't encourage people to get insurance. Yes. So my my insurance, my my knee surgery was $24,000, right? I only had to pay $800 because my husband has provided me with great insurance. Get insurance because you're gonna need it one day. You never know when. Never know when. Right. Necessary. Yeah, it's necessary, it's necessary, right? Please.

unknown 1:10:22

Right.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:22

And so I have a lot of people say, well, they will buy all kinds of designer bags and make sure I want people to understand I'm not judging nobody. I'm not judging nobody, but I'm saying let's get our prior to love. Yeah, but they won't get the teeth clean. Yeah, they won't get the eyes checked. Yeah, but you wear the Gucci belt. Okay, wear Gucci.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:44

My teeth are dirty.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:45

Yeah, I got Gucci belt, but I tell you, I make sure I take care of them teeth. Yeah, and that was part of my feelings. I went and got my eyes checked. Yeah, I got my teeth checked, I got my teeth done, keep clean. I go there every six months, get my teeth clean. I got my um mammogram, my pap spell. Oh, very important, and all that blow work, yep, and all the numbers showed that all that was going on with me. So I take time to do that. Save your money and get what you want. And if you have a loan, pay it back.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:09

Yeah, pay it back.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:10

If you borrow money, you know, pay it back.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:11

Yes, because at the end of the day, yeah, you want to you want to be able to have that availability for the future.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:17

That's right.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:18

Because we live in a credit system, yeah, and make arrangements.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:21

If you're in trouble, don't don't ignore it. Because they don't care as long as they're getting they will wait for you. That's right. They will wait for you. Get your credit fixed. But I don't know about these people to pay charge all the money for a credit fix.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:30

Oh my lord, you don't even have to do that, which is that what people don't understand. That's right. Call the credit and tell your situation. We're saying earlier about getting yourself knowledge, educating yourself, even paying, like if you can go get take a free class on credit and credit worthiness and building it, right?

unknown 1:11:46

Go take class.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:47

And a lot of the technical schools offer great things. They do know, offer great, you know, um, yeah, great things, you know. Oh man, and then they offer free services, they offer free services, yeah, and then they have you two university, Google, and all that, and then I study my competition. That is one thing you gotta do. You gotta study competition.

SPEAKER_06 1:12:01

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:02

Um, and what I do is I may not copy off my competition. I study and see what they're doing. I study their prices, all this kind of thing, right? But what I do is I go outside of the country. I go look for what somebody is doing in Australia, somebody doing in California, New York, that's in my same field. You understand what I'm saying? And that's how I get the knowledge too.

SPEAKER_05 1:12:23

Gotcha.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:23

So I study people outside of Columbus, South Carolina, out of you know, United States and out of like on the West Coast, those people that I study.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:30

Gotcha. So that way you have a well diverse.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:32

Yeah, well diverse and all that. Yes, and then what I do is I will take what I need, use it, and create my own. So I don't believe in, I don't steal people's ideals, I will take what they have maybe and create it to make my own life.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:46

It's some inspiration.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:47

Yes, that's right. Yes, but remember now, everything is fair game.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:52

It is, it is, you know what I'm saying? So yeah, don't let nobody think it's don't play around shoes. Microsoft will come and look at whatever man is doing and do it all the way.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:00

That's right. Yeah, so don't everything's fair game. Just be fair, you know. And like I say, I'll get credit where credit is due. But I always will take, like I'll take a recipe, and I will take it and change it around and create my own. That's why I told your wife, you know, if she don't have the numbers, give me the give me the ingredients. I can create the recipe for her.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:17

Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:17

So I'm good at that. But be intentional, love on yourself, take care of yourself, and she got help. And you know, entrepreneur, you know, ask questions, not to take what we have to steal it, but let's see how we can help each other grow. Let's see how we can collaborate together. I'm big on collaboration. That's right. Collaboration is gonna make the world go work.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:38

It does.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:39

And it was a group that I have joined, and this is the craziest thing ever. We didn't know anything about it. I'm talking it's color people, and I'm and it's been around for since 1986, and it's a business group, and they network with each other.

SPEAKER_06 1:13:55

Seriously.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:56

So they help each other. So that's what my whole thing is. I want a net group of entrepreneurs that I can pass. We can, and but you gotta you gotta be a giver too.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:05

Yeah, you can't always take, yeah. You can't always take it and that's the blessing to be able to give.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:11

Yeah, yeah, when I and I recognize people that's moochers that just want to take, take, take, and I cut them off quietly.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:19

I like how you say it's so elegant.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:21

So I cut them off quietly, okay? Because you're not gonna take everything from us, yeah. From us as camp, I'm talking about us as a group, yeah, and not give anything. That's not fair, it's not right.

SPEAKER_06 1:14:29

No, it's not, you know.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:30

If you know you need a podcast and it's in our group, why are you going to let's get a podcast or camera? You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_06 1:14:36

Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:36

Let's use it. Let's use it. Yeah, right. But certainly, if we're gonna use that, we gotta do a good job.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:41

Let's be good.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:42

You have to do good work. If you're gonna be in our group, let's do a good job for each other and for our community.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:46

You know, don't slack on them.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:47

No, don't slack.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:48

No, not at all.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:49

And be fair with your price. And some people I think over over over overpriced, you know, pricing.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:54

Fairness and pricing, especially if you want it, if you want people to come back, right?

SPEAKER_00 1:14:59

Be fair, show on that. Right. I had, and I'm gonna let you go, but I had this girl that stopped to me and she wanted a large charcuterie board, right? Yeah, and I was gonna put it on the board. And so she started with extra large, extra large is $149. I'm sure you had the price and go. She wanted a large $109. But when I finished the job, I said, this is more like a meeting. And I texted her that morning, I said, you know what? I feel on the size of the board that I did was a meeting, and your price was only $54. Fair. My conscience wouldn't have let me charge that lady $109, and I only did a $55 job.

SPEAKER_02 1:15:31

Man, it's morals.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:32

Be real morals, have morals and be intentional about what you do, intentional about how you look.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:38

Be intentional about it. Man, there's don't shorten any kind of thing. You were right on point.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:42

You are on point. And I'm gonna tell you, this is um, all right, so the podcast that I follow, and they're doing, they were doing this 90-day affirmation thing. They get up every morning at like 6:30 and they talk about different things to get you moving for your day, right? And this week the thing was being intentional.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:57

Intention is my word. It's elevation. Oh, you know, because you know, did you know that uh words have seasons too? Just like food have seasons, colors have seasons, styles have seasons. Yeah, words have seasons. So elevate, pivoting with memo, pivoting style coming with during the pandemic.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:15

Yeah, you're right. Everybody pivoting.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:17

I was pivoting like crazy, okay. I was trying to see what was working because I did not want to fall down. Yeah, you know, and this when I fall down, I get right back up. I don't stay down in that dump now.

SPEAKER_02 1:16:27

I believe that.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:28

Oh no, if something don't work, I'm gonna shift and pivot and try to tweak it. Yeah, because this place, and I think I told Kevin too, that this place was supposed to be for entrepreneurs like you guys to come in and have a place to work that wasn't all the way downtown.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:40

Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:40

That was for us, you know, no particular color, you know. But um, we wanted to make sure we had space for that. But everybody went home to work, or everybody was off a job, so we had to figure out how we're gonna do this. So then we partnered with a young lady to do coffee, her situation that worked out, you know. And so now we do more catering than more like a cafe. That's why I told Kevin, we're not a cafe, we're a spot, we have a studio, but also we have DHEC approved kitchen.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:04

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:05

So people that's unlegit, that's doing the catering, that's what I was gonna tell you. My wife, yeah, the catering job, we have affordable space for them to come and create them food.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:13

Yeah, in a clean. You know, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:14

So if they if you have a food, if you have somebody out there that's thinking about starting a food business, have a food truck or catering and need a legit place that's DHEC approved.

SPEAKER_05 1:17:23

Right, yes, and you can't do that.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:25

We have that space, yes, to be ready to rock up. Yes, I can help them with that, I can help them with the surf safe, and I can set them up with DHEC to get them approved and everything. So I'm looking for food entrepreneurs that need that space too. Because you see how we block them off a living, but they're working. Yeah, yeah. So the space is diverse. Yeah, it's entrepreneurs that need some place to have their workshop classes, it's a meeting space, it's an event space. You can have a party here. We've had people have weddings here, yeah. We saw we had our bridal showers, yeah, everything. You know, Jamie Drew did a beautiful event last night, yeah, and it was launching her bliss code, okay? And so we provide the food for them. So we have everything here in one space. But they loved it because it was intimate, it wasn't big old. That's another thing, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:08

That's what I like about space. Yeah, uh, because normally when you go to places like that, there's so much space, and you can't really fit in a space and you're just basically in a box, right? So select it. It's not a box, it's a stylized environment, right?

SPEAKER_00 1:18:21

And then you could dress it up and decorate how you want it. And we did nice, beautiful white tablecloths for her, and she came and bought her fresh flowers, and then we have professional decorators that come and help us. So I partner with profession decorators. We have professional decorator for a wedding, yeah, baby shower, bridal showers. I did a dental party for her husband, professional decorator came in. So I hired them if they go into a whole nother level. So I want them to come to to call me first of all, text me, email me, because I really want to collaborate with them.

SPEAKER_06 1:18:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:50

As long as you look presentable, you intentional, I would love to work with.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:55

Speaking of which, I want to make sure um that you let folks know about any current projects you have going on, and then um please drop your information.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:04

Okay, cool.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:04

I want you to drop the info so that they can know where to find you, how to get in contact.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:08

So I love to talk, but then they gotta text me because a lot of time when we're busy, I just need 15 minutes to get in a quiet place. They can text me or call me anytime at 803-665-5262.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:17

Right on running.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:17

I'm available. I love talking. I love to like push over and give you an opportunity. Right. Sometimes when Kevin called me, I said, I'll even answer the phone. Kevin, I'll call you back in 10 minutes. Sometimes in 30 to 45 minutes.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:29

No, Kevin, I called you during the middle of the day to tell you, not a problem.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:33

I get in, or I'll text you back. Very respect. She's not gonna be one of those people that are hard to get in contact with.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:38

No, not at all. If you text me too, I normally will text you back. Yep, or if I'll call you. So do know, I will respond back to you. And the other thing is they can reach me through email. Yes, it's easy. My name is Judy Ethridge, 803 at gmail. Um, and but if they haven't, like we have upcoming events now in January. Well, in December, we're having a kids two-day cooking camp, two weeks while they're out. Um, and then in January, those are December 20th and the 21st, and the other one is the 27th and 28th, then Wednesday and Thursdays.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:08

Okay, make sure we get that information.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:09

Right, yeah. I would love to have people, kids come and we and just cook because we host those two with groups. Yeah, we look for groups of female women that want something to do with leadership. So we do that here. We do wine tastings and they want to know about we have four different experiences. They come in their group to have a good time, laugh, talk, um, and then we have um, I take groups of people to countries. We just got back from Italy.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:31

Yeah, we're gonna ride with y'all uh South Africa.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:33

South Africa, we're going to September.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:34

My wife's serious about 2024.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:37

Yeah, we're gonna do that. Um, so that's another way to elevate, to learn about different cultures. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, so we have good time and we everything luxury. We are adamant about that, that we want you to be able to go and have a great experience. We try to pick the perfect weather, and you will have free time if you want to roam and do that. But we have amazing, um, an amazing um itinerary.

SPEAKER_06 1:20:58

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:59

We take everything. I'm very detailed, I'm strategic, and I'm really serious about what we do.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:06

And I know that's not a lot. It's no joke with what we do, okay?

SPEAKER_00 1:21:08

Oh, yeah. We're serious about what we do, and we're serious about bringing in the millenniums and collaborating with them.

SPEAKER_06 1:21:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:14

Because we learn from each other. Yeah, exactly. Like I say, I don't need anybody that moochies. If you know that you're a person that's selfish, that you're thinking about only yourself, yeah, you are not my type of people. I'm just gonna be straight up.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:25

Bravo.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:26

I want people that's gonna we gotta be together, get togetherness. The community is real because other people are doing it, like you were saying. Other people, why can't we do it? We're gonna do it.

SPEAKER_06 1:21:36

Yeah, we're gonna do it.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:37

2024, we want entrepreneurs in this room, millenniums in this room, having a good time, enjoying great food, laughing and talking, growing and experience. Yes, I really want to concentrate on my young people. I love you guys. I love what you do.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:51

And we need folks like you, we need our elders, our folks who have been successful, that we can see those pathways because for a lot of us, it's like we can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. And it keeps a lot of us from being able to push forward and give that that that understand that feel or well, the energy for self-determination. That's sad to say that. But when we get to hear from you all, the people like you who are supporting us and say, Yeah, I believe in what you're doing, even if you haven't heard it from any of the other elders before. I'm there with that. Yeah, man, it makes us try to do the work, spend the hours that we need to do in the right, um, in the right places and putting our energy in the right location. So um, I want to say this um before we end this episode. I'm so happy speaking with us today on this episode because it's our hundredth episode. I love it. And we do so much work together with you, right? That it's only fitting that you would be here at this episode.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:44

Well, thank you so much. And I'm just honest. And like I say, I tell people don't give up, don't give up on your dreams. Even when some people knock down, you're not knocking out. Just keep pushing. But make sure you have a way to live too. So you may have to have that first, then you know, a second job.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:58

Yes, yes. Oh, that's another part. Have a way to live.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:01

Like you have to have a second job. It's okay to have it.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:05

Okay. If you gotta flip a burger, so you can make sure you're pushing your dream. Go flip that burger.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:09

Don't push your high mighty. Save your save money. Yeah, I'm big on that. Because it's hard for us to get loans.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:15

It is. It's hard for us to get loans. Because it's red, it's red tape. Right, it's red tape. We don't get everything everywhere. Right. I told somebody this. Um, I'm not gonna hold too long, but I told somebody this. I've done the the the research on this. It's easier for you to come into this country as an immigrant and get a loan to start a small business than be an African-American citizen in this country and get that same fifteen thousand dollars. And you can have good credit, you can have good uh backing, etc. Unless you go to uh to a bank, a black bank, you're more than likely going to face some kind of rentation.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:53

But you know, some of it too we have created. Yeah, because like I said, we don't pay on time. There you go. Because you it was shown, it was shown during the pandemic now. You know, we got a lot of money, we got a lot of money, right? Yes, and so you know, Chef J hear a lot of things when people talk to us, so people is gonna get their body done. And I'm telling you, those designer stores, Gucci and Louis Vuitton, times was wrapped around the wall.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:14

Stop Chef J, but Gucci and my Louis Vuitton. No, but you're right, you can't have it now.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:19

You're gonna have it if you work for it though the right way. It's nothing wrong with that. I have all of that, but I have worked for it, and I'm gonna give you 110% when you I mean your person to do any type of job.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:28

I ain't gonna take that much.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:29

It's nothing wrong with it, because I want us to live that dream. We should live it, we deserve it. Yeah, and I'm I want people to understand that you should live a great life. Yeah, you deserve it. Oma Apron and say you deserve to live well. And I truly believe that. Yeah, you deserve to live well. You deserve to live well, but you gotta put in the work, can't be lazy, yeah, and you gotta be self-motivated.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:47

Well, I'm gonna say this uh before we sign off, I want to thank Chef Jay for joining us on this episode. This is DJ and what I gotta skip right here behind the cameras, of course, our esteemed guests, Chef J Judy Etheridge. We appreciate you um everything that you do to help and assist us in moving our dreams forward and other folks' dreams forward that we know um since we started coming here and using the services that you offered for us. We have seen nothing but expanse in what we've done, great expansion. Uh, even when, like I said, the funny thing is, like I said, guy works in seriously. Met her out at uh Soda City, my wife and I walking around just trying to find other black businesses to buy stuff from, and we saw the charcuterie that we're doing, and it was cool because it even um gave my wife uh understanding hey, if I want to do this, I can do this too.

SPEAKER_03 1:25:34

Because she was like, I was like, yeah, it looks good, don't it? And it's professional, it's black people, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:25:40

She was like, Yeah, and I like what they do. It's just like the stuff that I see on Food Network, and I'm like, I try to tell you you can do this. So that inspiration, it's just good for us to see that. And I just want to I'm gonna keep praying that we succeed, that things get better, that things always grow forward because as you grow, you bring other people with you. Yes, I'm definitely intentional about it.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:02

Intentional, you the best right. I intend. I'm telling you, and you know, sometimes too, like uh, because you know, charcuter, a lot of time, Caucasian do it, right? Yeah, and they'll call me and they'll ask me pricing and all that, and they'll have if they when they find out that I'm African American, they would definitely use their other sometimes.

SPEAKER_06 1:26:18

Yeah, and that's okay with me.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:20

That's okay because I tell people don't worry about who don't use you, worry about who use you, and do a good job for them.

unknown 1:26:24

That's it.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:25

Signing off the Hills Up Glock Clog Podcast. I want everybody, um, if you're watching us, listen to us wherever you're at, tell somebody next to him that you love them, that you appreciate them. And we're gonna see you on the next episode. Peace.